This last weekend was particularly hard for me. Friday morning my maternal grandmother's sister died. Aunt Millie was an amazing person, and I wish I had gotten more time with her. And more time for Josh to get to know her. God blessed us with the chance to visit her in early March when I had a business trip in her tiny little town. I'm so glad he was able to meet the person who came up with the peanut butter fudge recipe that we both love and Josh has memorized. I'm glad that she was healthy enough that we both remember her as spunky. I'm glad that her death was quick and that she didn't suffer much.

I didn't know her as well as I would have liked. I actually had just begun to talk to her on the phone every few months and let her get to know the adult I grew into instead of the child I was. I am exceptionally disappointed that I was not able to go to the viewing or funeral due to a business trip (we couldn't move it since it was already the weekend when I got the dates and times for the viewing and funeral). I am, however, glad that my mother was able to make the trip out and say her goodbyes. She really needed it.

Yesterday was also the 10-year anniversary of my cousin's sudden and accidental death. He was eight years older than me and lived several states away, so I didn't know him that well. It still grieves me that I will never get to know him better. I still cherish the memories I am fortunate enough to have of him.

Needless to say, this business trip to Ohio has been hard on me. I'm attempting to make up for it by doing all kinds of awesome things. I finished up work a little early and went to an aquarium in Kentucky. And tomorrow afternoon after putting in some hours from the hotel, I plan to visit COSI. And then I return home. I had a good time this afternoon and hope that tomorrow will be at least as fun.

But when it comes down to it, I wish for nothing more than the chance to be with my family. I will likely spend a bit of time with my grandparents this week. I know my grandmother needs me. And I need her.